DC bar- Monday Jan 21, 2004- Norm Coleman is a jerk

This is a post from a private message board that I wrote back in January of '04. With Coleman's re-election at stake, it is worth re-posting. Here it is:

"I went down to Butterfield 9 to meet Wendy after her committee dinner
last night. So I am sitting at the bar and these two guys sit down
next to me, one orders a Johnny Walker black on the rocks (which
happens to be what I am drinking), the other, a citron vodka. So
they get to talking and I am only 2 feet away so I hear what they are
talking about. The one sleaze starts talking to his friend about
his "friendship" with Ted Stevens (even though he voted against
Steven's ANWAR bill) and how he helped get the energy bill through so
that he could get 800 million dollars in subsidy to his "friends" in
the coal industry. He also mentioned that he was friends with the
President but that he won't back the President's budget because it
goes outside the fiscal parameters that Congress set... unless it is
certain that the budget will pass. Then he told his friend a very
disturbing "key to senatorial politics"... He only backs a bill he
knows will win and that way he can campaign on a "97% bill passage
rate". Norm Coleman. This is the guy that beat Mondale, right?
What a slimy fuck. Well, then the catering manager (?) for
Butterfield 9 came over grabbed Norm and his friend and took them to
there table. As she took them away the bartender made a distresed
face, being that they hadn't payed and the catering manager lady
simply waved the bartender off."

Nice.

Lifting oil drill ban would impact price-WH

"We would expect it to have an effect on the price, it's very difficult to quantify," - Keith Hennessey, director of Bush's National Economic Council.

Yeah it would. Prices would uptick slightly to generate funds needed to begin the new drilling iniatives and then would level off slightly higher than they are now. But BP in Alaska and Exxon Mobile in the gulf would generate higher profits as they sold the oil they drilled on US territory to Asia and Europe on the international free market at the same price rates set by OPEC. Net benefit to the American consumer... another swift kick in the pocketbook and less environmentally protected real estate. How is that for analysis, Keith?

Bullets of Peace to reunite for peace in the 5th District!

Bullets of Peace will be "spraying everyone with love bullets" in Trinidad DC sometime in the coming weeks. The recent uptick in violence in DC's 5th District (most notably in the Trinidad neighborhood) has prompted the now defunct and bi-coastal duo "Bullets of Peace" (Popular in Adam's Morgan around the turn of the century) to reunite. They will be bringing their notably ironic message to troubled NE DC in an attempt to sow the seeds of loving reconciliation. The band, long separated, will rock their signature style of loud, often inebriated acoustic rock. The misogyny is gone but the shout outs to GG Allin remain.

Metro DC driving

Like half a million other folks in the immediate DC environs I battle one of the nations worst commutes almost daily. The commute doesn't need to be as awful as it is though. There are little things we can all do to make it just a little less stressful. I figure it is worth noting them here just on the off chance that someone reading them takes them to heart.

Rule #1. Don't be an asshole. This is a macro rule. A lot of DC drivers are, by nature, assholes so I don't expect much for this one. Suffice to say it is an overarching guideline.

Rule #2. Merge lanes are there for a reason. Merge at the first opportunity, don't ride them to the end force everyone to come to a full stop and then try to merge. This idiocy costs us all in terms of time, stress, and gas. A smooth steady merge where every car in a driving lane lets one merger in saves us all time. The folks who can't abide by rule #1 are thinking " but I want to get to the front, it saves me time". I have done repeated empirical studies on this and you are wrong. All you are doing is slowing everyone down, including yourself.

Rule #3. Slower cars keep right. No brainer.

Rule #4. (Corollary to three) If you are in the left lane going parallel to someone in the right either pass them and move right or get behind them. Don't make everyone else suffer for your indecision.

Rule #5. Parking lanes are not "passing lanes on the right". 95 times out of 100 this is a stupid action (see rule 2 for logic).

Rule #6. If the sign says "no left turn", chances are there is a reason (two, actually, safety and flow of traffic). If, for example, a sign tells you not to take a left on 8th St., NW off Constitution during rush hour, don't try to. It just aggregates other drivers. Plus, 7th st., NW has a turning light! GRAY LINE DOUBLE DECKER BUSES TAKE HEED!!!

Rule #7. If someone has their turn signal on and you are in steady traffic, do the courteous thing and let them turn or pass. What does it cost you? We are all stuck in the same traffic, regardless of whether you are one car length ahead or one behind.

Rule #8. USE YOUR TURN SIGNAL. When you are turning, use your signal, it just make sense. Even more critical, when changing lanes, USE YOUR TURN SIGNAL. I know that the folks who can't abide by rule #1 are thinking "If I use my turn signal when I want to change lanes the guy in the lane I am merging into will try to block me out." This is true only when the other party is also unable to follow rule #1. Do we see the importance of rule #1 yet? It has implications on multiple levels here in rule #8. Regardless of one's ability to follow rule 1 though, think of it in these terms; If you signal the chance of having an accident while accelerating, resulting in certain lost time, likely lost car, and possible lost life is greatly reduced.


There we have it, 8 simple rules for making all our commutes just a little more pleasant.

Cheers!

This is only a test...